Saturday, February 14, 2015

Things I learned about Dating...while dating God. #2

2. Honor your Father and Mother

I don't know that I'm a huge fan of the "courting" concept. Especially when you are out of high school, moving on to college, or a full grown adult, "courting" is not practical, but honoring your father and your mother is.

When I was in grad school, I had a roommate who was from India. As I was embarking on my journey into dating, we would drink tea and discuss our relationship situations. She would tell me about her families concept of arranged marriages, and I would tell her of my crazy current heart longing somewhat for the safety and love that surrounded her future.

Choosing a spouse is (or at least should be) the second greatest decision you make in your whole life. (The first should be your acceptance of Christ as your savior) and at 21 I was not mature enough to handle this one on my own.....but I was too embarrassed of the situation to really allow my parents in on the process.

By the time I was thirty, I decided that was EXACTLY what I needed, and not only did I want my parents in on the process, I wanted my closest friends and mentor in on the process as well. I did not trust myself to not create an idol out of a man, and I knew that people who probably loved me, more than I loved myself, are going to be looking out for me.

I told my future husband that I would not consider him a "boyfriend" and would not be committed to him, until my parents met him. I wasn't too concerned about my parents giving him permission to date me, I just wanted them to be active in my dating life.

The hubs agreed, and went one step further. He said he wanted to confess to my parents his sins, and he wanted to make sure my Dad was okay that we were dating....AND he wanted me to meet his parents.

I was a grown woman, not living at home, but every other Sunday afternoon the hubs would have dinner with me at my parents house.

A couple months later, our parents met each other.

My parents got to know the hubs, and I knew when my father walked me down the aisle that he was completely confident, that the man standing at the altar was going to care for my heart.

Honor your parents in your dating relationship. You belong to three men in your life, God, your daddy, and your husband. If you are not including God and your Dad (and/or your mom) in your relationship with your dating partner, you need to stop what your doing.

Some parents do not feel comfortable "getting involved" with your life, especially your dating life. They might actually need the verbal permission and invitation from you.

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